Matt and Agnes Fettig

After 93 years of making the world a better place, Mathias “Matt” Fettig passed away peacefully at home on April 23, 2023, surrounded by family and joining his wife, Agnes, who preceded him to Heaven three days earlier.

Funeral services will be held at 10:00 AM, Wednesday, May 3, at Corpus Christi Church, 1919 N 2^nd St, Bismarck, 58501.

Visitation will be held 5:00-7:00 PM, Tuesday, May 2, at Parkway Funeral Service, 2330 Tyler Pkwy, Bismarck. A rosary/vigil service will begin at 7:00 PM.

Burial will be held at the North Dakota Veterans Cemetery, Mandan.

In a life grounded by his faith and his family, Matt touched so many people with his kindness and his commitment. As busy as he was, Matt always found time for others. This was clear by his many years of ushering, volunteering, and serving on the parish council at St. Mary’s, the church he loved dearly and which was like a home away from home. Among his many honors, perhaps his most cherished was receiving the rank of 4th degree in the Knights of Columbus.

However, his faith did not start and stop at the church door. For years he led family prayers every evening with his beloved wife of 66 years, Agnes, as his nine children gathered around. Personal prayer was always part of his daily life and brought him strength and solace as his waning years grew increasingly challenging. Finally, along with Agnes, he volunteered for many church and community groups for decades, always giving more than he received, and serving as an example to his nine children and his 19  grandchildren, all of whom he deeply loved.

Speaking of his kids, their love and respect for Matt only grew with time. As busy as he was, Matt was always present—every extra moment was spent at home with his family, whether playing cards, dominoes, or just helping around the house. And somehow, despite all the demands on time and resources, he would often take the family on vacation (always road trips), including an epic voyage to Disney World in a motorhome that produced a lifetime of cherished memories. Also, it must be said that he had a special knack as a parent in keeping his teenagers in line. When one of his children slipped up, all he had to do was show up: His silent presence was enough to set them straight.

Matt was not given to big speeches, but he spoke volumes with his actions. This was especially true in his approach to work, whether it was leading his top-performing artillery unit during his service in Army; delivering mail for years in so many Bismarck neighborhoods, where he always had a kind word for those on his route; or in the management of his business (Fettig Vault & Concrete Co.), where he led by example by grabbing a trowel or the cement bucket to work alongside his team; or even at home, where he not only proudly cared for his yard, but also regularly took the lead in preparing the Sunday chicken dinner. And speaking of food, his popcorn was renowned among the neighborhood children (the secret?—not gonna tell!).  Matt’s green thumb was legendary in our family. He loved his time in the vegetable gardens he and Agnes sowed with love and care so our summer dinners always featured fresh garden vegetables and tomatoes from plants 10 feet high. And their rhubarb plants were legendary and known as the sweetest rhubarb people ever tasted.

Matt could not resist a silly joke or a little zinger, which he always delivered with a twinkle in his eye and a smile. Agnes often referred to Matt’s sense of humor as “that Fettig sarcasm,” and she always laughed along, loudly. Agnes was also the official translator of Matt’s German witticisms—he had one for every occasion—which delighted them both.

And finally, Matt’s love for Agnes was his rock, his foundation against the challenges that arose over the years, and also the wellspring of so many joys. From their first date at a diner in Sterling, ND, through many nights sitting close together and talking at the dinner table, to holding hands in their later years and providing each other support, they were inseparable. He adored her. Matt’s devotion to Agnes will live in the hearts of all who knew him.

Matt was raised on a Logan County farm with his 13 siblings, where the values of faith, family, and work were instilled in them by their father, Mathias, and their mother, Theresa.  Matt is preceded in death by his parents, and by his siblings, Benedict, Frank (Regarda), George (Margaret), Theresa, Katherine (Phillip) Trusty, Anton (Verna), Margaret Mooers, Clara, Anna (Walter) Bruns, Joseph, Michael, Mary (Ron) Jacovetta, and Magdalen (Herman) Haas.  Their grandson, Parker, also preceded him to heaven.

Matt is survived by by his nine children—Darrel (Joe), David (Nancy), Douglas (Catherine), Diane (Larry), Denise (Gregory), Danette (Mike), Dwight (Monica), Debra, and Derik (Jocelyn)—and eighteen grandchildren, one great grandchild (with another arriving soon) all of whom he loved dearly.

Matt and Agnes had a servant’s heart and made delicious meals from scratch that nourished their nine children and the friend or two that would squeeze around the dinner table. Matt always set Agnes’s dinner place at the head of the table, and sitting next to her, they would fill everyone’s plates and take the time to talk to each of us, demonstrating selfless love and attention after their busy work-filled days. Because they loved to grow vegetables in abundance, to share with neighbors and friends; and to honor their charitable hearts, in lieu of flowers, please consider a donation in Matt and Agnes Fettig’s name to MSA United Way, Center for Opportunity Community Garden. https://www.msaunitedway.org , select donation “in memory of” column. Or mail to MSA United Way 515 N 4^th Street Bismarck ND, 58501.

Agnes Fettig (Kopp) left us for heaven on April 20th, 2023, after a life filled with altruism, love, and joy. Agnes was 92 when she passed away peacefully at home, surrounded by several of her children. She was joined in heaven on April 23 by her husband, Matt.

Funeral services will be held at 10:00 AM, Wednesday, May 3, at Corpus Christi Church, 1919 N 2^nd St, Bismarck, 58501.

Visitation will be held 5:00-7:00 PM, Tuesday, May 2, at Parkway Funeral Service, 2330 Tyler Pkwy, Bismarck. A rosary/vigil service will begin at 7:00 PM.

Burial will be held at the North Dakota Veterans Cemetery, Mandan.

Much of her life was defined by her selflessness. Agnes left a promising career at the telephone company and deferred her dreams of becoming a nurse when she and Matt started a family in Bismarck. (Notably, she also gave up her sporty red convertible for a more family-friendly car.) Agnes cheered on her children at countless band concerts and school sporting events. At home, she provided indispensable guidance on homework assignments at the kitchen table, especially in math, grammar, and reading. She also expertly maintained all the details of a home—including endless cooking, cleaning, and mountains of laundry—and made a point of including her children in those tasks to ready them for independent lives. And while juggling all of that, she found time to keep the books for the family business, Fettig Vault & Concrete Co.

While being the devoted mother of nine children, Agnes still made time to help those around her. Agnes was a longtime volunteer for Meals on Wheels, delivering meals to elderly members of the community, often with one of her younger children in tow.  Later in life, she volunteered at MSA United Way and served lunch once a month for 13 years at the Ruth Meirs Hospitality House. Agnes served as a Brownie, Girl Scout, Cadet, Cub, and Boy Scout Troop Leader for all nine of her children. Agnes also served on the Governor’s Task Force on Vietnamese Refugees.

Her Catholic faith was a central guiding light in her life, and Agnes played an active role in St. Mary’s Parish. Agnes loved singing in the church choir, especially for Christmas Eve mass. She also served as a eucharistic minister and volunteered for numerous church events. She and Matt believed strongly in the value of Catholic school education for their nine children from first grade through high school. Agnes participated in various fundraisers for St. Mary’s High School, including the annual carnival event that became a family favorite. Agnes loved her time in the extraordinary vegetable gardens she and Matt manicured with great care. Her pickles, made from freshly grown cucumbers, were the best in the world. And her cucumber salad was always highly anticipated.

The other major guiding force in her life was her lifetime of love with her husband, Mathias “Matt” Fettig. She and Matt modeled a loving marriage for nearly sixty-six years based on mutual respect, kindness, equality, and joy that serves as an example to their children and grandchildren to this day. Their marriage was the lodestar of the family through all the challenges and triumphs that go along with parenting. Asked once about the secret to their long marriage, Agnes stressed the importance of honesty and added, “You have to believe in each other, or it won’t work out.” As a testament to their lifelong desire to be together, Matt joined Agnes in heaven three days after her passing.

Those lucky enough to spend time with Agnes will remember her laugh—an initial shriek of delight, followed by her hand covering her mouth and her shoulders shaking in silent glee—delivered freely and with gusto. She never lost her sense of humor or the ability to deliver a clever one-liner, even as she handled the challenges of Alzheimer’s with grace and dignity.

Agnes was preceded in passing by her parents, John and Rufina Kopp, her sisters, Margaret Kopp, Louise (Joe) Haag, and Sally (Marvin) Craig, and her brother, Victor (Angie) Kopp. Their grandson, Parker, also preceded her to heaven.

Agnes is survived by her nine children—Darrel (Joe), David (Nancy), Douglas (Catherine), Diane (Larry), Denise (Gregory), Danette (Mike), Dwight (Monica), Debra, and Derik (Jocelyn)—and eighteen grandchildren, one great-grandchild (with another arriving soon) all of whom she loved dearly. She has one surviving sister, Marie (Bill) Glass. And she is survived by Victor’s wife, Angie Kopp. They will all miss Agnes deeply.

Agnes and Matt had a servant’s heart and made delicious meals from scratch that nourished their nine children and the friend or two that would squeeze around the dinner table. Matt always set Agnes’s dinner place at the head of the table, and sitting next to her, they would fill everyone’s plates and take the time to talk to each of us, demonstrating selfless love and attention after their busy work-filled days. Because they loved to grow vegetables in abundance, to share with neighbors and friends, and to honor their charitable hearts, in lieu of flowers, please consider a donation in Agnes and Matt Fettig’s name to MSA United Way, Center for Opportunity Community Garden. https://www.msaunitedway.org , select donation “in memory of” column. Or mail to MSA United Way 515 N 4^th Street Bismarck ND, 58501.